


Don't Tell

by kittyofnight



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Don't Ask Don't Tell, Fear, Friendship, Friendship/Love, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia, Some pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-31
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:13:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25634869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kittyofnight/pseuds/kittyofnight
Summary: Rhodey was in the military years before ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’ was around.  When it was just ‘Don’t tell and lie, lie, lie’.  He’d known he was going to be in the military long before he figured out that... maybe he liked the look of a man in uniform for too many reasons.  And maybe he liked the look of a man in other things too.  Really, it shouldn’t have taken him as long as it did.He took girls to dances and was a perfect gentleman.  But he didn’t have time for a girlfriend and never really wanted one.  James Rhodes was smart, but he never thought he was the smartest in his high school class, but he got the best grades anyway.He- might have realized something… or stopped being able to deny it… some time after meeting Tony Stark.
Relationships: James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark, James "Rhodey" Rhodes/Tony Stark
Comments: 6
Kudos: 74





	Don't Tell

Rhodey was in the military years before ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’ was around. When it was just ‘Don’t tell and lie, lie, lie’. He’d known he was _going_ to be in the military long before he figured out that... maybe he liked the look of a man in uniform for too many reasons. And maybe he liked the look of a man in other things too. Really, it shouldn’t have taken him as long as it did.

He took girls to dances and was a perfect gentleman. But he didn’t have time for a girlfriend and never really wanted one. James Rhodes was smart, but he never thought he was the smartest in his high school class, but he got the best grades anyway.

He- might have realized something… or stopped being able to deny it… some time after meeting Tony Stark. Not right away.

Tony Stark was clearly someone who needed protection. A freshman at fifteen who thought he was better than everyone else at MIT, including the professors, and didn’t mind saying it. Kid was going to get beaten up and not make a single friend, and Rhodey’s mama had raised him to protect people like that, even if Tony brought it upon himself. Being around Tony for a few minutes just… made it more interesting that the guy was right. He _was_ smarter than all of their engineering professors. Of course, he and Tony had no classes together, because in addition to being the fifteen year old freshman, he was also taking classes exclusively with juniors and seniors, and bored in all of them. If he had any normal general education classes, he was probably putting them off because they didn’t interest him. Or maybe he’d done all of those in high school too. Or _elementary school_ , or whatever.

Tony’s sixteenth birthday was a month into their first semester. By that time… Tony Stark was probably the closest friend Rhodey had ever had. Which was weird. But… Rhodey didn’t exactly attract close friends. He was no fun, the killjoy, but Tony didn’t seem to think so, even though he was the wildest person Rhodey had met.

“What do you think of the invitation?” Tong asked. “Sixteen’s the age of consent in Massachusetts, and this seemed the right way to celebrate that.”

It… was nearly explicit, and promised more.

“Tony, if you want to… lose your virginity, I really don’t think this is the way to go about it,” Rhodey managed.

“Oh, that plane took flight months ago,” Tony brushed off.

“What?”

“Well, maybe partially motivated by not wanting to go off to college as a virgin. Honestly, the only trick was finding someone no more than four years older than I was to satisfy the close in age exemption of New York law. Because I don’t want a new scandal implying I’d been taken in by a pedophile. I went to an NYU sorority party and talked to all the sober freshmen. I was _very_ mature- didn’t even get drunk.”

“So, now you want to invite a bunch of women over for an _orgy?_ ”

“Oh no, men too- anyone over sixteen but not creepy old, really. No professors. But I suppose I should make that more clear before distribution. I think I _will_ have sex with a man, because I haven’t done that yet- which is surprising, maybe, given my former boarding school, but no one was tolerable- or out. And group sex, obviously, because- orgy.”

Rhodey was reeling. “You- want to have sex with a man?”

Tony shrugged, “Why not. Is- that a problem for you?” Tony frowned.

“No- it’s- not just- what about AIDS?”

“Diseases are unlikely to be homophobic. It’s spread more rapidly in the gay male community because of a lack of condom usage because of a lack of pregnancy concerns. Wear a condom- no problem.”

“And if a condom _breaks_?”

“Buy expensive condoms and use lube, and they shouldn’t break? Look, it’s- scary now, because there’s no drug for it, and there might not be for a while, but there will be.”

That… then shouldn’t he not do anything risky until it was? And- girls too- herpes and pregnancy and… 

“Sorry- none of my business. I- it’s not the guy thing, I swear. I was just surprised- which- wasn’t a good reaction, sorry.”

“That’s okay, I’m a shocking person- so you’ll come?”

“What?”

“I gave you the first invitation- you’ll come?”

“Tony, I am _not_ going to an orgy.”

“Why not? It’s not like you have to have sex with a guy.”

“That’s not the point! I- don’t _want_ to have sex with _anyone_ I don’t know, or- or have a bunch of people see me naked that I’m going to have class with later.”

“Does that mean ROTC doesn’t have nearly as much locker room nudity as I am imagining?”

“What?” There- was some, but that was different. Rhodey certainly didn’t _look_.

“Forget it. Whatever, we scrap the orgy. I don’t want to have my birthday without my best friend,” Tony frowned.

“I- can see you earlier in the day.”

“Nah- I’m sure. Maybe I’ll have one some other time. Movie and pizza in my room?”

“I- yeah, sounds good.”

“Great!”

“Tony, where did you get that?” Rhodey trying not to let his exasperation show. Tony was holding a large bottle of liquor in the middle of the dorm hallway. Tony’s building, because Rhodey lived in a cheaper one. It wasn’t the first time he’d seen his friend with alcohol. And sure, he knew that many freshmen drank underage. He’d had a beer here and there himself. Never when he was pressured into it, because peer pressure just made him more stubborn… but he’d wanted to relax a time or two.

“Birthday present from dear old dad. Maybe the best thing he’s ever given me,” Tony said.

“ _Seriously?_ From your _dad?_ Get in your room,” he whispered the last bit, but they did. Army Sergeant Terrence Rhodes let Rhodey finish a beer once when he was sixteen. And he’d gotten to have a small glass of champagne at his cousin’s wedding.

“My old man handed me a finger of whiskey when I was six years old and told me it would make me a man,” Tony said when the door was closed.

“Damn,” Rhodey hissed.

“I’ve never told anyone that. Don’t tell anyone that.”

“I wouldn’t man, but- you know- you can tell people? Like- me, or there’s a counselor’s office if you want?” Or Child Protective Services. Which was probably more difficult when your father was a billionaire. Money didn’t make everything better.

“So, yeah, I admit, the whiskey to a six year old was shit parenting, but this bottle here, not even illegal. ‘Those under 21 can, however, consume alcoholic beverages provided by their parents or grandparents on private premises.’ Provided from parent, check, and private premises, check. Now, are you going to make me drink it alone? I will, but they say drinking alone is bad.”

James Rupert Rhodes never gave into peer pressure. “Fine,” he said.

He told himself it was because it was because it was Tony’s birthday, and it was so much better than the orgy he had talked Tony out of.

And convince him that if they didn’t finish the bottle- an activity that probably would have killed them both- it meant they could have more relaxed evenings later.

“Yeah, this is better than my first plan,” Tony mumbled later that evening. Rhodey was far more affected than he’d ever let himself be from alcohol before, but he didn’t think he was really drunk. Tony might be. His head was on Rhodey’s shoulder, and ending credits were playing. Tony had a large vhs collection.

“I’m glad,” Rhodey answered.

“I’ve never had a best friend before,” Tony admitted.

“I- haven’t really either,” Rhodey answered.

“I hope I don’t mess it up.”

Rhodey hoped he wouldn’t either.

“I won’t let you if you don’t let me,” he said. He really didn’t want to mess it up.

“Deal,” Tony agreed happily.

He looked like he might just fall asleep on Rhodey.

It was comfortable. Nice. Made Rhodey’s heart warm more than the alcohol. And the couch was probably more comfortable than his dorm bed, even sitting up. He wouldn’t let anything stop this. Definitely not… any extraneous thoughts.

  
  


At some point, Rhodey realized that that bottle was getting refilled for their subsequent movie and drinking evenings.

He didn’t call Tony out on it.

It was his own problem if he started noticing more Tony’s full lower lip pouting, and his flushed cheeks when he drank. Shining eyes. And really when he hadn’t been drinking either. Rhodey tried to keep the bottle away when it wasn’t a weekend, which would make Tony pout more. It was cute. But a best friend was not someone to have some experiment with, especially one he wasn’t allowed to have with anyone.

  
  


“So, what do you want for your birthday?” Tony asked him.

Rhodey had gotten Tony a band t-shirt the month before. For a couple bucks from a second hand store, but he would have spent more. He’d tried to buy their pizza, but Tony wouldn’t hear of it.

“Whatever, man, I don’t need anything.”

“Come on, I could get you literally anything. My dad doesn’t even check my credit card bill. Want a new car? I don’t actually know what my credit limit is, but I’d just say I wanted another one.” Because of course Tony got a car for his sixteenth birthday.

He did not need Tony’s money. Or Howard Stark’s money that would be Tony’s one day.

“My car works fine, and I hardly take it anywhere.”

“Is it older than we are?” he was surprised Tony didn’t know the year from looking at it. But, it wasn’t really the sort of classic or luxury car that would interest Tony. Though he wouldn’t mind working on it- that one instance had involved Rhodey actually working on the car while Tony suggested functional upgrades and appearance changes.

“No,” Rhodey insisted. Though it wasn’t that much behind Tony. Rhodey knew how to keep an old car moving.

“You know, a small plane is surprisingly inexpensive.”

“No.”

“Fine, fine. Something personal is better anyway. Though I argue that a plane is personal for you. I’ll just make something. You know, you wouldn’t have to worry about pregnancy or stds with a sex robot.”

“What!” How would that… no.

“Oh, God, Rhodey, I thought maybe you were closeted gay, but are you robotsexual? That would be amazing!”

“What!?” Rhodey protested. His traitorous mind had supplied Tony... on his hands and knees and… something on a mechanical arm doing... something to Tony. “I- I was shocked, which is a normal reaction to anything that comes out of your mouth. And now I don’t know if I want anything that you designed going anywhere near me. I was just shocked.”

“So- are you gay?”

“No.” Rhodey objected. With more projected calm than the robot thing- he hoped- even though it was freaking him out more.

“Because- you know I wouldn’t judge, right?”

“Obviously, man.”

“Gay is a totally okay thing to be,” Tony repeated. Tony didn’t sound defensive. More reassuring. Was Rhodey that obvious? No, Tony had no idea of the main part of it. He’d be far more awkward if he had. Tony Stark wasn’t as smooth as he tried to get sorority girls to think.

“Look, I’m not gay,” Rhodey said, more seriously than he’s ever said anything to Tony. “And if I were- which I’m _not_ \- it wouldn’t be something that anyone could think or talk about, because I’m going to be in the Air Force,” he said.

Tony blinked. Like it was something his giant mind had never thought of before.

“That sucks,” he said.

“It- is a bad rule,” Rhodey agreed. “It should be changed. And I’m lucky that it has nothing to do with me, because I’m not gay,” he said.

“Bisexual?” Tony asked. But he was trying to be not annoying, so Rhodey wouldn’t yell. And there wasn’t any reason to yell.

“No, not that either,” Rhodey sighed. “And I doubt the Air Force would make the distinction.” Though it would be easier to hide. Maybe he was that. Girls were fine. Girls could be nice. Pretty.

“Asexual?” he asked.

“No.” He said automatically. Maybe he should have said yes. Military couldn’t possibly have any problem with that.

“Okay- well, if you want a wing man picking up- girls then, I’m your guy. Or if you want to revisit the idea of making you a sex robot, because I could do that too, and wouldn’t judge. Hell, I’m sure I’d love a sex robot- literally limitless options.”

“I don’t want anything you ever make on, around, or inside my body, Stark,” Rhodey said firmly. He would remember those words later when they were very much not true.

Rhodey turned eighteen on October 6th, 1986. School cutoffs for kids was later then, so he was never even the youngest in his class. He wasn't unusual like Tony. But, it was still important. No parent would ever need to sign something for him. He could go to an enlistment office whenever he wanted. Which he didn’t want, because he was already on track to be an officer. With a mechanical engineering degree to be of some use in the Air Force, even if he didn’t intend to be an Air Force engineer. But, it was a career to fall back on. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t and would never be the sort of engineer that Tony already was. No one else was like Tony Stark.

Tony presented him with a high tech Rock’em Sock’em Robots and an easily brushed off, “I’m sure if you don’t like them, your little cousins would.” As if Rhodey would give these up. He’d seen it in a movie- when they were drinking and sitting on Tony’s couch- and Rhodey mentioned having the toy as a kid, but not being able to convince his sister or cousins to play with him often. This one could be set to have one of the robots move on its own. Tony insisted that it wasn’t that good at it, that he needed to make it much better, that it was just a poor approximation of random.

It was incredible, and Rhodey let him know it. Tony acted like he’d been the one given a gift.

They had burgers and a movie, and more of that whiskey. Not much, as it was a Monday and Rhodey insisted on restraint.

  
  


When Rhodey was into the really interesting actual engineering courses, Tony was already working on his Masters. His first Masters. But, it meant that he had access to a lot of equipment that undergraduates didn’t, and he showed all of it to Rhodey. With disclaimers that his father had worked with better stuff in the forties, which Rhodey wasn’t sure if that was an exaggeration or not.

  
  


When Rhodey got his first private, after hours tour of Stark Industries, including the labs almost no one got to see, Rhodey figured it probably wasn’t an exaggeration.

  
  


1991

When Rhodey graduated in 1990, Tony was working on his second Masters, and Rhodey had thought this one would probably become a PhD, just for Tony to have it.

A year later, Howard and Maria Stark died in a car accident.

It took Rhodey two days to get there, most of it travel time, and he couldn’t stay as long as he liked.

It probably helped him to get the time at all that all of his superiors knew that he was Tony Stark’s best friend, and Stark Industries supplied nearly all of their weapons. He’d had to play the card that continuing that relationship with the next generation was important. It felt bad, but it got him there.

Rhodey locked all of the liquor up but one mostly-empty whiskey bottle and hardly left Tony’s side.

He hated when he had to leave.

Obadiah Stane would be doing most of looking after the company. And Jarvis would be looking after Tony- who insisted he was fine and didn’t need looking after. That was a clear sign of Tony not being fine, but Rhodey couldn’t stay.

He called Tony when he could. Heard about the man’s activities even more. Either Tony started being less discrete with the women he picked up, or Howard used to do a lot of covering up. Rhodey wasn’t sure which. The tabloids never had Tony with a man. Rhodey wondered sometimes if Tony had ever tried that. Probably he had tried it once and didn’t find it worth revisiting. If there had been an orgy, Rhodey hadn’t heard about that either.

1993

When the new policy ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’ was announced, Rhodey was at home, watching the news with Tony on his couch. That phrase wasn’t in the speech, and it wouldn’t be called that until later, but that was the sentiment that stuck.

It was four days before Christmas, and when he’d asked for the leave time, he had mentioned Tony’s name, because that tended to get him what he wanted, because they wanted the majority owner of Stark Industries to be happy- and not alone at Christmas. So Rhodey would put up with sleeping on the couch in his childhood house to give Tony his bed. Tony had offered to share- the double bed- like it was nothing. That wasn’t happening.

Someone called Tony on his cell phone and told him to turn on the tv, before it even started, so they watched the announcement live. The phone call was brief, and Tony seemed excited. He started looking less pleased before the man Rhodey didn’t know had even introduced the president.

Rhodey’s heart must have been beating faster than it ever had in the force.

It didn’t help that Tony was looking… very attractive. He was trying a beard, which made him look older.

“That wasn’t what I was expecting,” Tony said, still frowning.

“What- were you expecting?”

“I only knew of lifting the ban. I- didn’t know about the rest. It’s what, subtly demanding celibacy, saying that’s just normal conduct, when their stance even when my old man was around them was, ‘don’t have sex in the middle of World War II, the prostitutes all have syphilis, but hey, here’s condoms,” he said.

“I don’t think the president ever said the ‘hey, here’s condoms’ part,” Rhodey pointed out.

“Yeah, but I would hope for more improvement in the last fifty years, so they don’t get much credit for that. And how about an _apology_ for discrimination and persecution?”

“Relationships between soldiers would be bad for unity, especially when they go badly,” and that was Rhodey’s dad.

“Okay- maybe- but I hate all of the political back talk- an open statement is a presumption of misconduct that they will have the opportunity to refute? An open statement of being _heterosexual_ wouldn’t make anyone assume they were saying they planned to have sex on active duty, much less with one of the female military or staff. They should be free to talk about some boyfriend- or girlfriend- back home if they want to. If that makes some homophobic assholes uncomfortable, _fuck them!_ ” That had Rhodey glancing at his father… who was looking back at him. Shit. What did the man think about Tony being in their home? About Tony’s impassioned defense of homosexuals in the military? Did he think… “Actually, I should use different wording, because I hope no one ever fucks them, so they can’t raise the next generation to try to make them as homophobic as they are. I don’t want to hear about the military leading the country in lack of prejudice, when they're even _behind_. Comparing it to the success with racial and gender integration when women can still only serve in a few roles, and that crowd of military leaders is almost entirely white men. And then what was that- saying no one will be happy with this, but if they don’t settle with this, Congress could pick something that some people would hate worse? And we need to move forward because this has diverted attention for too long? And the whole speech could have been five minutes instead of half an hour,” he complained. Rhodey hadn’t thought it had been that long.

No more witch hunt, he had heard that.

Not complete acceptance, but not active, searching persecution.

Less fear.

  
  


2001

The first time he could get a moment, Tony was his first call, but Tony called him first.

Rhodey was almost afraid to answer.

“Tony?”

“Rhodey.”

“Oh, thank God. Where are you?”

“I’m- well, I’m in Manhattan, but I wasn’t anywhere close.”

“Shit.”

“Hey, don’t worry about me. I’m worried about _you_. There’s going to be a war now, isn’t there? That kind of attack, and against civilians?”

“I- don’t want to speculate.”

“Well, I’ll make sure your guys have better weapons than anyone else.”

“I know you will.”

He was thirty-two, and he had never felt so old and tired before.

  
  


2004

Massachusetts became the first state to legalize gay marriage, with a court ruling in 2003, to take affect the next year. Rhodey hadn’t even visited the state in over a decade, since Tony stopped living there, but he knew Tony gave guest lectures at MIT on occasion. Gay marriage. That was… really something. Using the real word. Sure, couples across the country could have nice ceremonies without the word, could dedicate their lives to each other, but… Rhodey’s older cousins- who were practically his sisters- had always talked about _getting married_ , and he’d grown up thinking that sounded pretty nice. When he was a kid. In an abstract way.

There was a lot of fallout. A lot of trying to call them civil unions, like the few other states that had already done that. A civil union felt a lot like ‘Dont Ask Don’t Tell’. Better than it had been before, but not enough. When he let himself get mad enough about it, it felt like ‘Separate but equal’.

But those four justices in Massachusetts were doing better. It could be better.

A reason to visit Massachusetts never came up, and Rhodey didn’t try to make one. It wasn’t like he had anything to do there, and when he was stateside, he was always seeing his family, or Tony, or both.

2008

Tony was living in Malibu when gay marriage was going to be legalized in California. Rhodey had... sort of planned a visit to Tony, to have a reason to be in the state, and he intended to find himself _happening_ to walk near the courthouse on June 16th just… to see. The clerk’s office where people would get licenses, the courthouse where they could be married. No wait period state. He’d looked it up just… out of curiosity. There would probably be lines, celebrations, happy couples everywhere. His paranoia of being Tony’s friend had had him make Tony promise over a decade ago to never go through Rhodey’s online activity. And he trusted that Tony wouldn’t if lives weren’t at stake.

Instead, he didn’t even notice anything special about June 16th, 2008, because it was just one more day where his best friend was possibly dead, possibly being tortured.

When Proposition 8 made gay marriage illegal again in California, Rhodey wasn’t thinking of the state at all, dealing with the fallout of his best friend not making weapons anymore, but flying around in a tin can that was a pretty damned good weapon itself. And it looked amazing. And Tony almost died again, this time directly at the hands of a father figure.

Mostly, he thought that the government was always going to need weapons, and if they didn’t have Stark guns, they would have inferior Hammer ones. And… maybe some of the bigger weapons no one needed. But thanks to Obie, the enemy could get Stark weapons too. Or, hell, how many times had the US military sold their own weapons to some government they wanted to support, only to have them turn on them? It was all more complicated than it had seemed when Rhodey was growing up in the late seventies and eighties. Young enough to not understand Vietnam. Now he was old. And wondering how much Tony was right about.

  
  


2011

When ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’ was repealed, Tony was dating Pepper. Not that… not that it had anything to do with Tony. And his and Tony’s friendship had been tested a few months before. 

Tony had been more reckless than ever.

When the both knew he could be dating Pepper, he was having this… meaningless party with a room of scantily clad women and… and that wasn’t the point either.

Rhodey stole the armor.

The armor that Tony had made for him in the first place and would have given to him if they weren’t fighting.

Tony could have died again. The thing that had saved him in Afghanistan had been killing him, and Rhodey hadn’t known.

And there was this alien or _god_ or something, making the news too, and all the government channels. What the hell was happening to the world?

He should ask a guy out.

It could be public.

Wouldn’t be good for his career, but it would be good for thousands of people to see, maybe millions.

Maybe he had a two decade long infatuation with Tony, because Tony was so unattainable that it made him _safe_ to fixate on. Rhodey wouldn’t want to ruin their friendship. And Tony was far too public when Rhodey couldn’t be public. Someone he couldn’t have was safe. Whereas another real man…

Rhodey wouldn’t make a very good psychologist.

  
  


2012

His best friend had taken a trip through a _wormhole_ to save the city, not from aliens, but from a nuclear bomb that their own people had sent to the city. The government Rhodey had worked for for half his life, and usually done so proudly.

And Rhodey had been in Hong Kong.

By the time he got there, it was all over and they were eating shawarma.

And Tony was faking being okay.

Tony asked him to stay over- Rhodey agreed immediately. They gravitated towards the room Rhodey stayed in in the Tower. It was still structurally sound, JARVIS assured him.

“Is Pepper in the city?” he asked.

“Yes, but we broke up,” Tony said.

“Wh- when? I’m sorry Tony.” He was.

“Just before celebratory shawarma.”

“Shit,” Rhodey hissed.

“I broke up with her,” Tony muttered.

What?

“Tony- was it- to try to protect her? Because you deserve to be happy.”

“It’s not that. I just- don’t love her the way I’m supposed to,” he shrugged.

“That’s- okay to figure out. And- I’ll listen to anything you wanna tell me.”

“Same to you,” Tony responded.

“Do- I need to lock up the liquor cabinets?” A glass or two with friends was okay, but Rhodey worried.

“Only if you leave.”

“I can stay.” For a while. For as long as he could.

“Maybe a movie?” Tony asked, nodding his head at the wall opposite Rhodey’s bed that held a large screen.

“Sure,” he said, following Tony to settle against the cushioned headboard.

It was a more comfortable place for both of them to fall asleep than any couch.

  
  


“Rhodey, you know you can tell me anything, right?” They hadn’t made it out of the room to have breakfast yet. Still in yesterday’s clothes. _Badly_ needing a shower. There were probably numerous government agencies demanding to talk to both of them.

“Yeah,” he answered.

“Because… because… I know- you don’t owe me anything, but I- kind of expected some kind of confession a year ago- when ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’ was finally gotten rid of- I tried working on that _years ago-_ a few times- and probably just pissed more people off- which I know you know about- but- you know you could tell me anything?”

“I know,” he said. And he could. Tony would be good about it. It would be awkward as hell, but Tony wouldn’t give up on their friendship.

“I mean it, literally _anything_. Like- like even if you told me you were… into kids, I’d be proud of you for never acting on it and would listen or get you whatever expensive, discrete help you want.”

“Tony, what the hell?”

“Well, I would!”

“You would. And- I appreciate that, man, but it’s _really_ not that.” He’d never even noticed _Tony_ until the boy was sixteen, and Rhodey had only been seventeen.

“Robots?”

The suits were attractive, but didn’t really do much for him when they were empty.

“No.”

“And not asexual?”

“No.”

“Pansexual?”

“No.”

“Demisexual?”

“I- don’t even know what that is.”

“People who only experience sexual attraction after an emotional bond has formed.”

“I- don’t- think so,” he said. Maybe the most honest thing he’d ever said- and yet, on the other hand, he wasn’t sure if it was true or not. He could appreciate an attractive man. Differently than he could notice an attractive woman. But his tastes had changed with Tony. From a younger, soft, almost effeminate look- to nice beards and lean muscles, traits that reminded him of Tony. And he didn’t actually want to have sex with them, or he probably would have by then. But he wasn’t at all sure that that was the same thing. “Fuck, I don’t know.” And _that_ was the most honest statement he’d ever said.

“Is it me?” Tony whispered.

“Tony-” how many times had Rhodey lied to him? But not that directly. “Tony, you really don’t need to be worrying about me after the days you’ve had,” Rhodey said. It wouldn’t be a satisfying answer to Tony. He didn’t know why he’d wasted their time on it.

“Pepper’s amazing. But I broke up with her because when I was flying a nuclear bomb into a wormhole, I wasn’t thinking about her. Wasn’t thinking of the life I wouldn’t get to have with her. Rhodey, I was thinking of the life I- never _really tried_ to have with you.”

“I- probably told you I wasn’t gay a dozen times,” Rhodey said.

“Five times, and three of them were in the same conversation when you were seventeen,” Tony corrected.

“What?”

“Hey, no surprise voice! I listen to everything you say- unless I’m working on science, but occasionally even then- more than I do to most people at least. And I promise that discussing your sexuality could distract me from _any_ project. Though my thoughts when I thought I was about to die were soppy and domestic and not about sex. I don’t need to have sex with you- or anyone but my hand and maybe an invention or two- if you don’t want it, you know?”

“Tony you- broke off your relationship because- you think- this?”

Tony shook his head, “I broke up with Pepper because it wasn’t fair to her that this is what I _want_. What I’ve wanted most of the time since I was fifteen. I mean- I wasn’t going to wait around if you didn’t want it. Or- if you wanted it but wouldn’t let yourself have it. And most of the time, I just thought it was my ego seeing what I wanted to see. And I knew the military was important to you, and I wasn’t going to jeopardize that, when you made it clear that it was the priority over your romantic life. And even- when it was less banned… ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’? My track record there isn’t great. I would have _tried_ to keep it secret, _really tried_ for something this important. I swear I wouldn’t have shouted it out at a press conference like- some things. But there was that time before then when a reporter literally took a picture of me taking a shit from under the stall door so… it wasn’t like I could promise discretion even if I tried as hard as I could.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to,” Rhodey murmured- which might have been the wrong thing to say.

“Yeah. And then… I was dating Pepper, and that… was so different than any of the meaningless pretty faces I can hardly remember. I thought- this had to be love, and maybe- maybe it was to some degree. But not right, not enough. I- afterwards, I thought about- you know I heard every Captain America story I could. Practically the only thing my old man and I could talk about civilly. And he knew more stories than anyone else, stories he hadn’t been there for. When Rogers went down in the plane, Peggy was talking to him. And I wouldn’t want- and Pepper wouldn’t want either… I’d want to hear _your_ voice.”

“You need more people in suits around you, so that you’ll never be the only one to be able to go on a death mission. If I had known about it all sooner when I _hadn’t_ been on the other side of the planet.”

“I don’t want you taking a death shot.”

“Well, tough. I’d fight you for it.”

“Because you’re such a good friend or…?”

“I- realized- some of it on your birthday,” Rhodey admitted.

“Which- my sixteenth birthday?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, so- can I kiss you?”

“It’s- been a while, and I’ve… not done a lot else.”

“I have more than enough experience for two people. And have no rush or expectation, except I would really like to kiss you.”

“Have you- with a man?”

“I’ve done lots of things with men. None of whom were particularly important to me.”

“I’ve never seen a picture of you and a man like that.”

Tony sighed. “A reporter asked me once- maybe in ‘92- if there was more between the two of us than friendship. I- didn’t want that accusation ruining your career. And there was never a man I saw myself really being with. And, back when I cared, it wouldn’t have been good for my own career either. It was my choice, so don’t go blaming yourself.”

That was twenty years ago.

“I’m old.”

“You’re _gorgeous_ , and if you’re old, I’m old too, if we both live to die of old age, I’ll be overjoyed, and I’ll still probably go first, because of my heart condition and poor life choices, which works great for me.”

“That’s a lot of planning when we haven’t even kissed.”

“Yeah, well, I’ve been at least half in love with you since 1986, there’s no level of horrible kiss that could put me off. You could vomit in my mouth, and I’d still love you.”

It wasn’t horrible, and there was no vomiting, and Rhodey very maturely didn’t ask if Tony had been on either side of that before.

  
  


They didn’t go public right away mostly because of Pepper, because she and Tony had only just broken up. Tony did tell Pepper, because she deserved that. Rhodey didn’t think she seemed very surprised. More bittersweet.

Tony was not magically okay that he had flown a nuclear bomb in a probably one way ticket. Some times were difficult, especially nights. But Rhodey was there. And they were both happy.

  
  


2013

They made their announcement- well, Tony did- at one of the six events commemorating the anniversary of the Battle of New York that Tony was invited to. He picked the one he did because it was actually on the day after, and more uplifting. He’d been to a more solemn one the day before. And he’d checked that Pepper was okay with it.

Seventy-Four dead. Rhodey wasn’t thrilled with all he knew of war making that number seem so small. 2,606 died in New York from a more famous day, plus the 157 on the two planes. It was only so small a year ago because both the Avengers and the civilian crowd control efforts went so well. And Tony. Stopping a nuclear bomb, and lasting fallout that Rhodey didn’t want to imagine. He never looked at the payload or model projections. He could see why they did it- because this unknown force could take over the entire planet- but it was always a bad plan. With no certainty that it would close this portal once it was made, and complete assurance of the large number of people who would die, from the initial blast damage, radiation poisoning, and cancer.

More than even those seventy-four deaths, New York and everywhere else lost a different sort of security. They knew that aliens were out there, and the first large scale introduction wasn’t a bunch of ETs.

But they’d gained the Avengers.

The government spread the propaganda that sending the bomb into the wormhole at the same time as deactivating the portal was always the plan, that alien tech interfered and would have made it hit the city, but Iron Man saved the day. When really, they aimed for Stark Tower and the apparent source of the portal. Rhodey had been worried when his best friend had shared his plans to make the second tallest building in New York City. It naturally had given him anxiety. But Tony was so excited about sustainable energy, about the future. And Rhodey couldn’t have anticipated this. Tony had agreed to not attempt to refute the government’s story, at least for now.

Rhodey tried to focus on Tony’s words, “But, we all are here today because we know that it is important to celebrate the happy times. And the person who makes me happiest in the world is Colonel James Rhodes. My best friend since we were teenagers. And who I am now exceedingly proud to call my _boyfriend_.”

  
  


2015

By the time gay marriage was legal everywhere in the country, Tony and Rhodey were already past their fist wedding anniversary. The ceremony had been quiet. Without any members of the press. Tony had posted one picture to Twitter, because yes, _of course_ he could use Twitter- he was literally a tech genius. He could also make every twitter user follow him if he wanted to, but he’d never do that, he’d said quickly. Even though he talked about how he wanted to show Rhodey off to the world.

They were both still ‘superheroes,’ still had dangerous jobs. They both worked too many hours, and sometimes didn’t get to see each other enough. Occasionally their daily contact was reduced to asking JARVIS and the new AI for the Iron Patriot, FRIDAY, to give an update on the other of them.

But usually they had each other to balance themselves. To make the worst parts seem manageable. All of the emotional turmoil. Like when Steve Rogers came to Rhodey with the knowledge that Tony’s parents had been murdered by a brainwashed Hydra weapon- who happened to be the longest held prisoner of war in American history… well, Rhodey explained it better than Steve could have. It was difficult and painful, but inside of an hour, Tony was plotting how one of his technologies could be augmented to address brainwashing, discussing who he might need to contact, and asking Rhodey to coordinate with Steve on peaceful apprehension.

Rhodey and Tony had always worked as friends, and it turned out that being in a romantic relationship was even easier, because they didn’t have lies and pining in the way. And Rhodey learned more from Tony every day they were together, mostly about unapologetically being himself.

Whatever came, they could handle it.

**Author's Note:**

> Note: I was debating pretty heavily between M and T on this one, but I think I kept it T. If you have doubts, consider it M. There is mention of pedophelia, but no underage activity between the main characters, or technically between any characters. 
> 
> I really enjoyed digging further into history for this one. Comments and Kudos appreciated!


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